"... -ryo sas- ..."
"Dis... -tasi-..."
A wailing sound quietly pervaded the small compartment. It was annoying him, why didn't it let him sleep? It had been a long time since he slept without the nightmares coming. He tried to get back to sleep. Wake me up when I'm dead, voice.
"Disenga... -stasis-..."
:: FIVE MONTHS EARLIER ::
"You're back." Phiss looked at the monstrosity of Ceramite and machinery with equal parts shock and awe, with the whip of a black portal right behind him. This was Duke, if his SKRFID tag still said anything. Sort of. Why was it in his nasal cavity? Did he really...?
He was silent as ever, but he still looked different. He definitely wasn't this big before, but then again, the bugger missed out on the limb extension craze. Well, some people were getting shortened, but they were in the minority. Why, he wondered. Could they not get a good enough look at the floor? The intimidating figure clicked his massive hands together, massive in comparison to the rest of his friends who had gathered before him. Lox, eating his sandwiches that would probably kill your average organic life form. Hildold was on his way, he had just finished swindling some poor FNG out of his crown allotment for the day.
A message came to Phiss on Knight mail from Duke. Right, he still couldn't talk. At least that didn't change. The enclosed was short and simple, but no less world-shattering to the little knight: "Found a portal. Walked in. Went to a strange place. Had some adventures. Now I'm back. Chip this paint off my armor, please."
This blew his mind. Wait, what?! He had found a wormhole or some way around the tractor effect? Bull*ZZRT*! Bull f-*ZZZRT*-ing trojan *ZZRT*! "So wait. Let me get this straight. You escaped this horrible place. You escaped Cradle. Right?"
The monolith shifted uncomfortably in his considerable armor. "Yes." He mailed to him.
"And you came back."
"Yes."
"Why?"
Lox didn't even skip a beat. "Because it's fun here! We like our job! Isn't that right, Duke."
Phiss had absolutely no words in his vocabulary to quite express what he thought about that. Well, he did. But he would cause a lightning bolt to strike everything saying all that was on his mind right now. All he said before storming off in an angry little tantrum was "Why the *FZZZT* was it you, then?!"
Hildold came back from the auction house, probably smiling like a jackal if not for the fact that his Quartermaster was upset. "What's his problem?" He said, pointing at the direction Phiss went. They didn't have much of an answer for him.
Somewhere along the way back to his home, he tripped over something. An odd, scorched cube made of some strange material. It was going to change his life.
::PRESENT DAY::
Phiss blunk himself out of his sleep, and suddenly, he was back in his cramped little escape pod all over again. "Disengaging Cryogenic Stasis. 100% Complete! Welcome back, Phiss!" The onboard computer chirped. It was entirely too happy, and entirely too early to wake him up. It had only been...
Four months. Huh.
He gripped his helmet, trying to dull his pounding head. Okay, okay. It wouldn't wake him up and it wouldn't be flashing red for nothing. A bleary mind tried to make sense of his situation. He did a little digging with the onboard UI. Clunky, ineffective thing. The Spiral Order's top dollar, ladies and gentlemen. If he had a window, he wouldn't have needed it to know what was wrong. Namely, he found his destination. Anyplace else.
"WARNING! IMPACT IN 00:19:31:61! CRYOGENIC STASIS DISENGAGED. SYSTEM UI RE-ENGAGED. PLEASE PREPARE FOR IMPACT."
Oh, right. He doesn't know how to fly these. Which is good, because this thing didn't exactly have landing gear to begin with.
"EMERGENCY SIGNAL FOUND. PLAY? Y/N."
"Why?" He said, an errant bit of dream escaping from his lips. Or whatever was behind the helmet.
"Awe YEAAAAAH! Good morning, Universe!"
Ow ow ow head is pain, ow ow ow why is she still talking and... What is she? Equine in nature. The signal gave him the moniker DJ Pon-3 and really not much else. Okay, okay. Trace the signal and... Is she having sex? On the *FZZZT*-ing... Okay, okay, sending a message, maybe they're friendly. First contact. Yay.
"WARNING! IMPACT IN 00:04:21:59! PLEASE PREPARE FOR IMPACT!"
Thank you, panel. I wouldn't have known I might die now if you didn't tell me. Like I wouldn't know that wearing my safety harness and praying that the precursors won't be quite the conglomeration of jerks he knew and loathed today was the only thing I can do right now. As the red streak flew and scorched the atmosphere over Traverse Town, he could only hope that he would land safely. What was the saying? Some doors, once opened, cannot be closed; just as some missions, once accepted, offer no turning back?
Yeah, well. If this whole trip was any proof, he didn't quite believe that.
Last edited by Phiss on Sat Jun 23, 2012 5:19 am; edited 1 time in total